Game development is a hard thing, and I can only imagine how many hours coders and designers have to put into a project in order to see them being completed and released to the public. It’s hard to make art. But there are times I look at a game, and for as much as I want to respect the hustle and the effort put into turning 0s and 1s into a piece of interactive software, I still want to ask: why make this? What was the point of creating such a thing? Who is this for? Case and point, I was constantly asking myself these questions while playing, or better yet, enduring, Hot Blood.

Alright, you made them zombies; but how are they still able to do martial arts stances?

The premise is simple: the protagonist, known as Roxy, is just casually strolling at the mall (because where else would a preppy girl be, apparently), when a zombie outbreak kicks in, and she needs to get the hell away from said mall. Oh, she also has a boyfriend, and she has to rescue him. How will she do that? Martial arts, blunt weapons, the occasional firearm, throwing dumbbells at zombies, the usual stuff.

The idea isn’t the worst in the world, even though it is literally the same setting as Capcom’s Dead Rising (killing a multitude of zombies inside a mall, using whatever you can find to dish out as much damage as possible). The problem lies in the execution. Nothing, and I honestly mean that, NOTHING about this game works at all.

Earn cash in order to buy new (hideous) outfits for your (hideous) protagonist.

Where to begin? Well, the game looks awful in terms of its visuals. Repetitive enemy designs, awful post-processing effects, and a character model that’s a mish-mash between the OG Virtua Fighter and that awful Charlie’s Angels game for the Gamecube. In fact, this Charlie’s Angels comparison will come back multiple times during this review, because Hot Blood reminded me of that disaster more times than it had any right to. Between the (un)sexy character design, janky animations and odd focus on hand-to-hand combat, my childhood trauma came back to the forefront like a bullet train.

Another game Hot Blood is probably trying to either make fun of or be a love letter to, is Lollipop Chainsaw. I mean, you are a preppy girl fighting zombies, and can pick up a chainsaw as a momentary powerup during certain levels. The problem is that Hot Blood also thinks it’s funny, making your character spit out an annoying quip or one-liner every time you defeat a zombie. The soundtrack is very ignorable, but it’s not the worst thing in the world. Roxy’s one-liners, on the other hand, are the worst things in the world.

The pistol basically kills anything in one hit, two at most if it’s a bulky (but rare) zombie.

A terrible presentation is, well, terrible, but I could have ignored those flaws if the gameplay was any good. As previously mentioned, this game is clearly trying to be some kind of “homage” to Dead Rising and Lollipop Chainsaw, and those two games are perfect examples of good gameplay loops carrying poor visuals and sound design on their backs. Sadly, in Hot Blood‘s case, I think the gameplay is actually worse than the visuals or quips. It’s just incredibly bad, completely devoid of responsiveness.

In essence, the game features thirty levels, each one of them being a shop inside the mall. Kill every single zombie inside the shop, the level is complete. There’s some obtuse leveling up system, which gives you extra health and (apparently) more strength. You can collect cash whenever you kill a zombie, which can be used to unlock new (ugly) outfits for your (ugly) protagonist. Powerups are plentiful. You will always find a bottle of Coca-Cola in each shop; they replenish your health. There are also tons of weapons to momentarily wield (a baseball bat, a chainsaw, a gun), and you can pick up and throw a crapton of things, from porcelain plates to a goddamn dumbbell.

Feel the pain caused by having a keyboard thrown at you, evil zombie!

It does sound somewhat interesting in theory, but the end product is a disaster. This game’s combat is unbelievably sloppy, being basically a bastard mixture of playing Yakuza with half a second of input delay and the aforementioned Charlie’s Angels game. The camera is bad, the button placement is horrendous. Hitting enemies can often be a chore, since moving around is so wonky and imprecise. At the same time, the AI is so unbelievably idiotic that it barely makes a difference. The game is really easy, and lasts for maybe two hours, if you even decide to bother with it for such a long period of time.

I’m struggling to understand who this game is for. Hot Blood was released in July of 2024, a mere days after the announcement of a brand new remake of Dead Rising, and months after the announcement of a Lollipop Chainsaw remake. The two games this craptacular disaster is clearly aiming to play like are getting revived pretty soon. The visuals are too simplistic to be appealing, but not simplistic enough to feel retro. It’s not funny at all, nor is it sexy, so you can’t even call it fanservicey. Maybe trophy hunters with really low standards can see the appeal on getting yet another platinum trophy after a mere two hours? That’s the only demographic I can think of.

It’s basically Lollipop Chainsaw, but 700 times worse.

In short, Hot Blood is a game with no charm, no appeal, and no redeeming technical or design qualities. It’s hideous to look at, and it plays as awfully as it looks. When a game tries to be a love letter to Dead Rising, but all I could think of while playing it was that it reminded me way too much of the Charlie’s Angels game for Gamecube, considered to be one of the worst games of all time, you know this one is a gigantic failure. Its low pricetag and short duration might entice trophy hunters, but I can assure you there are less annoying (and embarrassing) ways to grab a few extra trophies for your PSN account.

Hot Blood is available now on PS4, PS5, PC and Switch

Reviewed on PS5.

A copy of Hot Blood was provided by the publisher.