Here’s a stupid question: when’s the last time you felt like a game liked you? I don’t mean like when you lie awake at night, wondering if Futaba feels the same way that you do. I mean, does the game actually want and welcome your presence when you’re playing? We live in a wonderful world of varied games that come in all flavors and lengths, and it can sometimes be a given that a game wants to be played: after all, why else would a game exist otherwise? Some are purposely obtuse or hard (I Wanna Be the Guy always comes to mind), but “difficult” and “unpleasant” are distinctly different. No, I mean a game that not only feels welcoming, but also, continuously, feels supportive and light. A game that wants to be played and wants you to keep playing. That indescribable acceptance is my experience with Crossy Road Castle.

I’ll beat you to the punch: yes, this is the sequel to that mobile game that everyone and their aunts (mostly their aunts) have played. And yes, if you have Apple Arcade, you’ve probably already played Crossy Road Castle because, hell, I’m already paying for the subscription, might as well try everything on there. A sort of endless Frogger, the original Crossy Road was charming and captivating enough that it got plenty of attention for the development team Hipster Whale. This led to a direct Disney sequel, helming the massively successful Pac-Man 256, and generally earning a lot of acclaim for Australian devs in general. who thankfully took the good from their successful title and didn’t just reprint the concept.

But we haven’t wandered back into the same formula with Castle. Instead, this is now a vertical approach in multiple mini levels of platforming. Broken up into chunks of thirty levels at a time, the player has to survive traps, monsters, and bad timing to make it to a boss character and defeat it through some innovative approaches. The levels are randomized after the first time through, so you never know which room you’ll enter when you pass between the doors. Controls are limited to walking and jumping (no double jump), so players are reliant on the environmental assists to make speedy ascents and split-second decision making possible. Touch a spike or a baddie and you lose a heart and have to start the stage over again, and three hearts out means game over.

Naturally, the game cannot exist without being cute as a button, and Crossy Road Castle covers everything of that nature in spades. You have your core Crossy animal team to begin with (chicken, duck, cat, and giraffe) and players gradually unlock more through specialty gacha machines. While regular coins are plentiful, you need to be dexterous and ambitious to grab the coveted purple coins that work the character dispenser, and you need fifty of the aforementioned coins to get a chance, so this is not a fast process. Thankfully, beating the boss always nets you at least one purple coin, so the process is constant, if slow. Once I get the penguin that moves by always sliding on its stomach, I’ll finally feel complete.

Regular coins are everywhere, and you might inherently want to collect those anyway because, well, it’s a platformer: coins are a given. Those coins serve an important double purpose as well. Every ten levels is a vending machine that can replenish lost hearts to the tune of 100 coins a pull, so having a decent bank is crucial to long-form survival in this game. Additionally, you can always use the coins to purchase festive hats from another gacha that gives you plenty of versatility for when you’re playing with friends. Maybe everyone wants to be the unihorse, but you can identify yourself with a jaunty chapeau or a teapot because why the hell not? 

I have to say, as someone who bounced off the original Crossy Road very quickly (though I enjoyed the aesthetics), I was astonished at how much I enjoyed playing Crossy Road Castle. For one, the controls are exceptionally tight and responsive, which is essential to the long-form investment. The difficulty of the stages ramps up very slowly but surely the deeper you get into each tower, to the point where it becomes a matter of life and death by mere millimeters. The eagle boss of the first tower, for example, goes from “big burly bird” to “bullet-blasting buzzard” over the course of two incarnations. I couldn’t believe how quickly it morphed into a danmaku survival situation, and I finally got to show my kids some leftover Touhou skills that I’ve mostly let atrophy.

Once you get the hang of it, Crossy Road Castle has an absurd amount of content to unlock, with several towers worth of levels that don’t have a standardized model of design that leads to repetition or boredom. Each tower has its own aspect of mechanics and concepts to keep it fresh, and even more so when you consider the different aspects you want to ferret out. When I played this at BitSummit, I was told there were approximately 80,000 levels that could be generated, and I frankly believe it. Every room is a short story of accomplishment and skill, and it weaves together seamlessly to tell a magnificent tale with each and every climb. The secret doors that lead to green gems for a bonus character unlock are exciting and legitimately challenging, and there are daily challenges if that’s more of your thing for leaderboard-driven accomplishments. 

Additionally, the multiplayer is fan-freaking-tastic. Up to four players at a time can climb the tower, and it honestly feels much better to have other people along for the ride if only for the support factor. If you touch something and “die” in single player mode, goodbye heart, hello anxiety. But with other people tethered to the game, you have a grace clause that, as long as SOMEONE finishes the stage, everyone advances with no lost hearts. This benefits literally everyone, from people playing with newcomers who may lack precision to folks who make constant mistakes (like me) and need other people to pick up the slack. Thanks, random giraffe in a tophat, you really saved my bacon more than once!

The inclusion and support of crossplay meant being able to find players online in seconds if no one is around to jump in, and Crossy Road Castle has a pretty solid player base to choose from. Being able to lash my Switch copy to the PS4/5 and Xbox players who are choosing this instead of Astro Bot or whatever is fun nowadays on Microsoft’s side of the fence (Solitaire?). The concept is simple enough and the servers are strong enough that there aren’t any issues with lag or connectivity, plus the execution means that the dependency on others doesn’t need teamwork: just for support and co-existing.

When I load up a run of Slay the Spire, The Binding of Isaac, or Balatro, I know I’m going to be playing for a while: these are gameplay loops that have been hammered out to an addictive degree, and I’m investing my time for my own enjoyment/dopamine hit. But I also always feel like I’m here because it’s almost expected, like this is where I have to be. These games expect me to do my best and, if I fail, then I’m a failure, get out of the line, and let someone else play. It’s like when I looked up at the cabinet for Primal Rage back in the day, and, the second I fell, someone shunted me off the machine so they could have the next fight. No one was mean, but this was transactional, everyone knew the deal.

Crossy Road Castle feels like it’s excited to have players participating. I don’t just mean the visual aspect, which is inarguably cute and silly. I mean the actual feeling is welcoming and joyous in the celebration of the game. When you move, it’s with a fluidity that feels right for this world, not hyperrealistic but also not so clunky you’re bound to make a mistake.

The heart machines keep you going for a low cost that still asks you to try your best to survive. The linked intent of the multiplayer gives that real “when you win, everybody wins” sensation, like I’m part of a team-building exercise where it’s not just corporate trying to cover up the latest scandal in the office. This is a game that loves to be played, and wants everyone to play it. You feel encouraged when you fail, and there’s a vibe to the atmosphere that tells you you’re welcomed and wanted.

Maybe it’s a silly thought, but having a game be fun AND also enjoyable almost feels like a lost novelty. You can be cynical and think about how these mechanics evolved from a pay-to-win cycle that many mobile games rely upon, but I see it as a useful extension of knowing what works and transforming it into something that has no sinister motivations. Daily challenges, silly hats, tons of levels and lots to unlock equals plenty of reasons to play, but it’s the wonderfully joyous ecosphere that makes you not only come back for more, but want to get others to come along with you. It’s not “I need to play this,”  but “I want to,” and that’s become a lost art amongst certain titles.

You won’t end up ripping out your hair with Super Meat Boy-style anguish or develop blisters from Super Mario Wonder moments of precision, but you will have a long-form romp of fun with Crossy Road Castle. If you have family and friends locally or afar, you can all don your favorite silly accessory and head out for some superb platforming that asks you not to be the best, but simply try your best: this game’s got your back, your fellow players do, too, and it’s just so nice to feel like a game is happy you’re there. In truth, it makes me very, very happy as well.

 

Graphics: 8.0 The chunky pixel style of Crossy Road is almost iconic at this point, and it transfers well into this vertical endeavor. Plenty of variety in towers and landscapes, plus bosses are cute and well-designed. A bit repetitive, especially when you’re on a very long run, but it’s to be expected.	Gameplay: 7.0 Move and jump: this couldn’t be more simple if it were coded for the NES. Players have to get into the right headspace to move through some more difficult rooms, but the game could not be more generous with help, particularly in multiplayer mode. Would have liked to see more variety in the rooms themselves like I saw in the boss differentiations.
Sound: 6.0 Upbeat music with plenty of pop and quirky sound effects is exactly what you’d imagine for Crossy Road Castle, and Hipster Whale does not disappoint. It works well for this particular game, but it’s not walking around music: I am, thankfully, not living the life of a Looney Tunes character.	Fun Factor: 10 Just delightful. It’s a cross-platform joy to experience and it actually made me very happy to share this with my kids and my family. Two family members installed it on their phones immediately. It’s got the right blend of bubbly and spacey to make it silly, but it never quite goes too far into ridiculousness, so you can still play and have a great time.
Final Verdict: 8.0

Crossy Road Castle is available now on Apple Arcade, Nintendo Switch, PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, Xbox One, and Xbox Series X|S.

Reviewed on Nintendo Switch.

A copy of Crossy Road Castle was provided by the publisher.