One of the many, many, MANY games I reviewed during the pandemic was Narita Boy, a slick action platformer set in a Tron-esque virtual world. It felt like the whole world had fallen for that title, but in my opinion, it was… fine. Not amazing, not bad, just fine. It had a neat presentation, an amazing soundtrack, but its gameplay was average at best, and it was plastered with a truly ludicrous amount of seizure-inducing strobing effects. That felt like a one and done kind of game, not something that would spawn a franchise, but I guess I was wrong… or sort of. Haneda Girl, as the name clearly implies (it’s also named after a Tokyo airport), is set in the same “universe”, but is completely different in terms of gameplay.

You are that shining little pixel onscreen. Those wine stains are actually the blood of my enemies. Metal.

Haneda Girl is a more arcadeish title, one that felt a lot more similar to Katana Zero and Hotline Miami than its previously mentioned predecessor. It’s a movement-based stealth platformer, in which you’re thrown into a small, visually minimalistic level, and you’re told to kill everyone and reach the end goal before you get discovered, and, as a result, shot. One hit, and you are dead, back to the beginning of the level. Unless you are riding a mech suit, which can withstand some impressive punishment, at the cost of mobility.

The main appeal of the gameplay loop is hopping in and out of your mech, which can be constantly summoned in front of you with a teleporter, depending on the situation. You cannot be stealthy with the mech, you can’t jump high, and you are unable to go through smaller doors. As the titular Haneda Girl, you can jump higher, wall-hop, and activate a temporary cloaking device. The game emphasizes completing its levels quickly, and by chaining combos together. This is the only way you can attain a score high enough to warrant you a medal. You need medals to unlock secret levels, and getting those scores is easier said than done. In fact, it feels demotivating given how punitive Haneda Girl is with any of your mistakes.

If you can kill multiple enemies with one move (such as dropping this metal beam onto them), you can get a lot of points.

I don’t even think that Haneda Girl is overly difficult and infuriating. You can learn with your mistakes and complete levels with enough determination. But the way the game forces you to complete a level in a very specific way (and speed) to be awarded something felt exaggerated and demotivating. Thus, I somewhat stopped caring about trying to unlock secret levels after a while. Even if a chunk of the content would end up being gatekept, I just couldn’t be bothered.

It also didn’t help that levels look way too similar to one another in terms of visuals. Haneda Girl is excessively minimalistic in its presentation, with the difference between worlds basically being the one color their walls and platforms will be. Graphical variety is not this game’s forte. The same can be said about the emphasis in storytelling; I just didn’t care about it at all. The one true saving grace in this game lies in its soundtrack. Just like Narita Boy, it’s a collection of catchy and high-octane synthwave songs that fit in perfectly with the game’s retrofuturistic aesthetic.

The mech is slow and can’t jump high, but it can withstand a barrage of attacks.

Not all indie darlings live up to the hype, apparently. Haneda Girl might even have a decent gameplay loop, but it’s uninteresting in terms of its story, visuals, controls (its button placement is odd at best) and overly demanding medal system. I can think of a handful of arcade action platformers I’d recommend over it, but if you’ve already beaten them all and are salivating for something akin to Hotline Miami or Katana Zero, I guess Haneda Girl still gets the job done. Great soundtrack, though.

Haneda Girl is available now on PC.

Reviewed on Intel i7-12700H, 16GB RAM, RTX 3060 6GB and Asus ROG Ally.

A copy of Haneda Girl was provided by the publisher.