1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! Is a visual novel from KEMCO and fledgling developers Furoshiki Lab that feels more like someone telling you about a dream they had instead of a game. Sometimes a friend desperately tries to relay last night’s theater to you because, for them, it was a fascinating experience where they were the star and they had no idea what was about to happen. However, for many, the exact details begin to slip away the longer they are aware, and critical moments fall apart, without any anchor to reality to keep them tangible. Moreover, the dream also has context to it that may only make sense in the dreamer’s mind. Sure, it’s hilarious that Barry spread tartar sauce all over the tuba, but why did he have sauce in the first place? Where was he that had unguarded tubas? And who the hell is Barry?

The story centers around Vanitas, a…spirit? A ghost? Something not alive? She’s a person-shaped being who apparently lives in the underworld. Vani quits her job of being a housekeeper or something to try her hand at an experimental new technology: a call center for ghosts. It’s run by Ari, a mysterious figure who thinks this’ll help the reapers of the afterlife (called gr1ms) to assist souls in getting beyond the barrier and into the next realm. There are some who are skeptical, and it’s up to Vani and Ari to prove the concept works and will not threaten the gr1m’s positions. Along the way, they get help and opposition from different characters, including another spectre running away from her past and another who clearly knows Ari from a different job. Actually, besides Ari’s former boss who stops in for a moment, that’s the entire cast. 

1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! presents as a combination of visual novel and time management simulation. On the VN aspect of things, you read. There are no choices, you are not the protagonist, and nothing in the literary aspect influences how the game goes. You just read some brief exchanges between the characters, and even that can be a little confusing. There are a limited number of facial changes between characters, and speech and thought bubbles look very similar. Moreover, there are times where it seems like one person will react to another’s thoughts, causing me to wonder if there’s lore about being able to read minds that isn’t talked about, or is perhaps just assumed. The way these readable moments play out hinges on your performance in the time management aspect, so do your best when it’s time to answer the call.

During the interactive parts, you’re in control of Vanitas in the hot seat as calls on the switchboard come in quickly. You have to read what the call says to quickly decide which of four choices need to be made: police, map, ambulance or disconnect the call. The caller will make comments in pink text to clue you into what they need: things like “they’re trying to exorcise me” means the cop icon, “I’m lost” calls for GPS backup, “I’m hurt and dying” is the ambulance and no pink text means it’s not a ghost, so hang up before this living meatbag makes things weird. The first couple of days have calls more spaced apart, but soon they’re basically overlapping, causing you to speedread information before time runs out and the call disconnects (which does not count as a win for callers who should be disconnected).

The interactive moments are surprisingly brief: the calls only come in for, at the longest, a couple of minutes (not counting the 100 call challenge you can do post game). Some are purposely tricky, like saying things about being in a massive car crash, but now you don’t know where you are. Or you really enjoyed being a ghost taxi, but now someone called a hippy lady on you. It’s a clever enough concept, but it also is exceedingly brief and the time limitations don’t make it enjoyable to try and solve the puzzles. Most of the time, I simply guessed and hoped for the best: if I got it wrong, it was easy enough to reload the chapter, skip to the calls and try different ones. They appear in random order, but you get the same calls each time, so memorization helps.

As for the visual novel part, 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! feels half baked in concept and execution. The world of Vani and Ari seems like it could have a lot to it: the ideas of hearing spirits through the static, the counsel that oversees the afterlife, the gr1ms and their job and what it means for the future. But everything is encapsulated in this building that Ari owns/runs, and we see literally nothing outside of the preamble before work and some critique/praise when the day is done. There’s decent enough response for good and bad results, but the world is too lofty and simple with good ending turns. If you want any drama or information, you need to fail the days, which seems counterintuitive.

I didn’t dislike the characters for the same reason that I don’t dislike the guy sitting across from me on the train to work. I don’t interact with him beyond a polite nod when I recognize him, and I don’t really care if he’s not there one day. My time with 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! was so brief that I barely had time to really get to know anyone. I appreciate the idea of just delivering this notion to players and not wanting/needing to add anything else, and there’s quite a bit to like. The art styling is unique and the designs of the characters have a distinction to them. The music is the right kind of frenetic electronica that keeps you intent on the calls and the overall tone of the game. 

But it all goes by in a blur, and it barely skims the surface of the pond, causing the slightest of ripples that disappear almost as quickly. If it weren’t for the fact that the script seems to have a very erratic use of numbers for letters, it would be entirely forgettable. Keep in mind: I know that Furkoshiki Lab is a Japanese team and, as such, translation may not be entirely on point, because QA takes time and effort. Zero issues there. But the number of times where we drop in ones and zeros for letters but do it inconsistently drove me mad. I couldn’t tell if it was intentional and only some words were meant to have them or if the idea just never came to full fruition for whatever reason.

1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here!  is decent enough: great design, novel plot, alright mechanics. I appreciate that the touchscreen on the Switch works even better than controls when it comes to the switchboard. But it honestly feels like it ends right as it’s getting going, leaving the player high and dry in terms of real resolution, character development and satisfaction. I didn’t dislike the game, but the rough edges felt sharper without space between them, and the overall takeaway was Shakespearean: “Out, out brief candle! And then is heard no more.”

Graphics: 6.0 World is mostly unchanging, taking place in Ari’s establishment and the switchboard itself. Characters have a very amateurish design, but it’s charming in its own right. The black and white motif feels like it’s saying something, but I have no idea what.	Gameplay: 5.0 Everything hinges on the call answering, which is frantic, short and difficult to decypher. However, it’s just a matter of replaying the same verses again and again to nail the better result and get the good ending. The VN aspects were decent but brief, and the inconsistency in the typeface bothered me.
Sound: 6.0 Not a lot of variety in the soundtrack, but the electronic madness was pretty solid. I really enjoyed the title track, and the overall effect seemed fitting for a place beyond life with oddball goals.	Fun Factor: 5.5 Just not enough to really drill down on. The characters are fine but I barely knew them. The switchboard repeats and you can try for a high score. It’s not terrible, but there isn’t anything here to hang my hat on.
Final Verdict: 5.5

1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! is available now on Steam and Nintendo Switch.

Reviewed on Nintendo Switch.

A copy of 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! was provided by the publisher.