Review – Road Bustle

The time has come for me to fill in my yearly quota of “questionable games”. You know the type; the kind of game that shows up from out of nowhere on the PSN Store. The poorly made asset flip that makes you question if Sony actually puts in any kind of effort when curating its system’s library. I’ve tackled some stinkers in the past, such as Life of Black Tiger, Little Adventure on the Prairie, and Flowers Are Dead. This year’s hidden gem is Road Bustle, a game that as of the time of writing, is actually a best-seller in the PS4 storefront. Not because of its quality, but because of what it offers for its price tag.

Road Bustle

The best assets an engine store can provide.

If anything, Road Bustle is pretty straightforward with its premise and it doesn’t try to waste your time with any exaggerated explanations. What you need to do is simple: you need to keep crossing roads and rail tracks, avoiding getting hit by trains and buses along the way. That’s it. It’s an even more simplified version of Frogger, if you can even imagine that’s possible. Keep on walking and avoiding traffic, with the possibility of riding a small ship (that looks like a traffic light) or a golf cart for a brief period of time in order to cover more ground faster, until you eventually grab all of the game’s trophies.

This is why people are buying Road Bustle in droves. It’s not because it’s fun, because it isn’t. It definitely isn’t for its visuals and overall presentation, because I have definitely seen better looking games on the 3DO and Sega 32X. Without a doubt, it wasn’t for its terrible and poorly mixed soundtrack. People are buying this game because it takes like ten to fifteen minutes for anyone, regardless of his/her level of skill, to get a platinum trophy.

Road Bustle

I don’t know if this is a spaceship or a floating traffic light. All I know is that you can ride it.

This is one of those games meant to boost your trophy count (and as a result, your ego) with ridiculously easy trophies that require absolutely no effort in order to be obtained. All you need to do is walk in a straight line until the coveted platinum trophy prompt shows up onscreen. You don’t even need to worry if you get hit by a car, as this game’s score is cumulative, meaning that you can keep getting hit over and over again, and your score won’t ever reset. There is literally no challenge in here.

Road Bustle

You can also drive a golf cart. Through rail tracks. Yeah, this game’s art direction isn’t exactly brilliant.

You’ll spend about fifteen minutes between downloading Road Bustle, getting all of its trophies, and uninstalling it. It actually took longer for me to write this review than it took me to 100% the freaking thing. Technically speaking, it’s not a completely broken game, as it does what it advertises, but it’s so pathetic and uninspiring. It’s the most inglorious way for you to get a platinum trophy to boost your PSN profile’s notoriety. If you’re so desperate for one of those, just play any of Telltale’s games for the system. At the very least, you’ll play a moderately decent game before grabbing an easy trophy.

 

Graphics: 1.0

It’s no exaggeration when I say that there are better looking games on the 3DO and Sega 32X. But hey, at least this game runs at 60fps…

Gameplay: 3.0

All you have to do is cross a series of roads. It’s by no means broken, but it’s oh so uninspired.

Sound: 2.5

Road Bustle features some questionable background music choices, all while featuring one of the clunkiest sound mixing I’ve heard in years.

Fun Factor: 1.0

You’ll spend about fifteen minutes between downloading Road Bustle, getting all of its trophies, and uninstalling it. Quality gameplay wasn’t its main priority; giving you the cheapest and most inglorious platinum trophy of your life was its objective.

Final Verdict: 1.5

Road Bustle is available now on PS4.

Reviewed on PS4.