The first time I saw the trailer for Adios, developed by small indie studio Mischief, I was instantly intrigued. No, it wasn’t for the gameplay, as the trailer barely showed any semblance of it, but because of the setting. I could immediately notice that the game was about a pig farmer who uses his animals to eat chopped up human parts for the mob. That good old body disposal method just like how Alan Ford taught us in that iconic scene from Guy Ritchie’s Snatch. Furthermore, the farmer wanted to leave the world of crime, a world that one has a way in, no way out. I wanted to play the game to see what kind of weird crap would ensue, as I was already sold on the premise. Man, was that a mistake.

Sure, the premise was good. But the thing about Adios is that, well, barely anything happens during the mere couple of hours it takes for you to reach the credits. Most of the game revolves around talking to one of your closest “friends” in the mob; a man who’s trying his hardest to convince you not to leave the business.

You’ll then show him a day at the farm, doing a crap ton of menial rural work, without the benefits provided in games like Story of Seasons. You’ll obviously, partake in a few “minigames” (if you can even call them that), watch a few cutscenes, and then uninstall the game from your hard drive altogether. Don’t even get me started on the fishing minigame. If you think Ocarina of Time‘s fishing sections were horrendous, you ain’t seen nothing yet, my dear friend.

Don’t get me wrong, the voice actors do their best with what little they’re given. The voice acting is, without a doubt, the best thing about Adios, as well as one very impactful scene near the end of the game. Sadly, said scene will lead you nowhere. The overall story is a slog, as you’re a stubborn farmer won’t listen to a mobster telling him to rethink his options. Not even while milking some goats, not even while doing some competitive shooting, not even while playing the glitchiest game of horseshoes in the history of gaming.

This is one of Adios‘ biggest issues: it’s a messy glitchfest. I understand that the Covid-19 pandemic made the act of developing a game even harder, but Adios was basically released in its beta stage at the very best. At the very best, on an Xbox One, it runs at around 15 to 20 frames per second, with terrible frame pacing. Its characters are poorly animated, with their entire facial animations being comprised of either having their mouths open or closed. Imagine a bunch of human characters talking like the Muppets and you’ll understand how the vast majority of Adios‘ character interactions looked like.

That little cutscene nearing the end of the game and the surprisingly competent voice acting are basically the only minuscule silver linings in an otherwise patience endurance test. Adios is a story-driven game with a boring story and a lack of compelling characters. It’s full of minigames that are either broken or just too boring to play. It’s ugly to look at and its framerate is nauseating. Considering the fantastic premise, this should have been a lot better and this is what disappoints me the most. I don’t remember the last time a game felt like such a waste of potential like Adios. Not counting Cyberpunk 2077, of course.

 

Graphics: 3.0 I would have been able to forgive Adios‘ poor visuals and Muppets-esque facial animations if the game didn’t run at around 15 to 20 frames per second.	Gameplay: 3.0 Between struggling with the poor framerate, partaking on menial “minigames”, dealing with poor physics, and listening to a ton of exposition, there’s not a lot to be praised in Adios‘ gameplay department.
Sound: 7.0 It’s riddled with annoying sound glitches, but giving credit where credit is due, the voice acting is downright excellent.	Fun Factor: 3.5 One extremely impactful cutscene is the only positive aspect of a game that’s really ugly, insanely glitchy, and, to top it off, excruciatingly boring.
Final Verdict: 3.5

Adios is available now on Xbox One and PC.

Reviewed on Xbox One.

A copy of Adios was provided by the publisher.