The Destroy All Humans remake came out a few years ago, and while janky as all hell, was still fun. Wreaking havoc on humans with your alien weapons and psychic abilities is as fun nowadays as it used to be all those years ago. THQ Nordic is set on releasing a sequel this year, but it seems that they were cooking an extra piece of content for us before the main event: a standalone multiplayer experience called Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage.

In paper, Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage sounds like a good deal. A standalone multiplayer Destroy All Humans! experience, being a combination of the cathartic feel of the base game and wacky multiplayer modes and maps isn’t a bad idea. Even if the game itself barely looks, plays, or sounds better than the original, with the exception of the framerate improvements stemming from these brand new next-gen versions, this had potential. And to be honest, if you play a match, you can see there was a good idea behind this concept. It’s madness, even though there’s no free roaming. The problem lies on one simple issue: playing the damn matches themselves.

It’s actually almost impossible to find a match in Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage. The game is deserted. Lobbies are empty. The one time (yes, you read that right: ONE TIME) I managed to find a match throughout the span of a week, I had to wait in the lobbies for almost twenty minutes. I went to the bathroom, then went to the kitchen, made myself a sandwich, ate it, and by the time I came back, I still hadn’t found a match. When I did, I had to endure glitches and connection issues. The game just doesn’t want to be played, and after a while, I felt like doing it that favor. Sure, you can play it locally, but only with other players. There is no way to play a match by yourself with bots.

I’ll keep this brief: Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage is worse than dead on arrival. The thing had already rotted beyond recognition before launch. Online lobbies are absolutely deserted, there are no bots, and playing this locally, while possible, is boring. The worst part about this title as a whole is the fact THQ Nordic decided to release it as a standalone expansion that doesn’t require the base game at all. Not only does it cost more than your average DLC deal, but that also means it’s susceptible to being treated as a game of its own. And as a game of its own, this is an embarrassment. Just wait for Destroy All Humans! 2. I know I am.

 

Graphics: 6.0 It runs better than the original Destroy All Humans game, but at the end of the day, it looks dated.	Gameplay: 6.0 IF (and that is a huge if) you manage to find an online match, be ready to deal with connection issues and some lag. They do ruin the overall improvements brought to the table by the power of next-gen hardware, namely the vastly improved framerate.
Sound: 6.0 It follows the same sound design featured in the original Destroy All Humans game, with much less banter.	Fun Factor: 1.5 Calling Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage is an understatement. The thing had already rotted beyond recognition before launch. Finding an online match is harder than actually finding aliens in real life.
Final Verdict: 4.0

Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage is available now on PS4, PS5, Xbox One, Xbox Series S/X, and PC.

Reviewed on Xbox Series S.

A copy of Destroy All Humans! – Clone Carnage was provided by the publisher.