“Playing a brand new Witcher game published by Devolver Digital” wasn’t on my 2026 bingo card, or any bingo card ever for that matter, but here we are. Devolver, CD Projekt Red and developer Nerial joined forces to come up with a brand new iteration of the latter’s Reigns series, the “choose your own adventure via swiping left or right” series of games where every decision ultimately leads you to a gruesome death, resulting in Reigns: The Witcher, a game that might have some presentation and limitation issues, but it’s easily the most fun I’ve ever had with a Reigns game. It’s such a perfect fit for the series’ premise, it felt like a stroke of genius.

Words you can hear.

For those unaware of what the Reigns games are all about, they are visual novels in which the story is generated based on the outcome of your decisions. You are always presented with two options for any given situation, and all you got to do is swipe left or right to decide what’s happening next. It’s never a fully acceptable resolution, with each outcome resulting in you gaining or losing favor points with specific factions. Gain or lose too much favor with a tribe, and you will die. In Reigns: The Witcher, the gameplay stays the same, with you having to deal with humans, non-humans, sorcerers, and your witcher school. Piss the non-humans too much, and they’ll kill you. Act like a crappy or lazy witcher, you will be sent back to Kaer Morhen to re-study. Be too much of a nice guy, and you will be invited to a party and die of an overdose.

How can I say no to Triss? I could easily say no to Yen, though.

What makes Reigns: The Witcher feel like a stroke of genius is that these stories are being created on-the-fly… by Dandelion. Yep, you are playing as everyone’s favorite bard coming up with nonsensical stories about Geralt based on some randomly generated scripts you gotta follow in order to increase your score. Your audience might want to hear a story about resilience, so your goal shouldn’t be about killing monsters too often or solving people’s issues, instead being about surviving for as many turns as possible. In another example, the audience might want to hear a raunchy story, so you gotta try to woo the ladies pretty often. If you complete these objectives at the end of a run, you will level up and unlock new “inspirations” for new story outcomes, which will unlock new characters and situations to deal with.

A genius way to mix the world of The Witcher with the gameplay loop of a game that can be enjoyed by anyone with access to a PC, a portable computer, or a phone. To top things off, the soundtrack is exactly the same one featured in The Witcher 3. The same sound effects as well. Downright perfect for a game where the graphics, while adorable, aren’t the most exciting thing in the world. Listening to the now-classic Novigrad or tavern party tunes from one of the best games of all time was one of the most pleasant surprises whilst tackling this otherwise simplistic and straightforward game.

It’s not the most exciting combat system, but the fact it’s even here is already a breath of fresh air.

What differs Reigns: The Witcher from other Reigns games, presentation aside, is the inclusion of a combat system. It’s as simplistic (and somewhat clunky) as the rest of the game, but it’s a neat icebreaker from the otherwise stale gameplay loop. Every now and then, you will have to face a monster or an angry mob, and you gotta partake in a combat-based puzzle consisting in you hopping left and right on a field, avoiding icons that represent enemy attacks, whilst carefully calculating and reaching icons that represent you attacking them.

Given how each icon and Geralt move one tile at a time, you have to properly plan your movements in order to avoid getting hit. If you lose all of your hearts, the run is over, but if you defeat a foe, you can actually reset some of your favor score in order to continue your current storyline with a bit more lenience. To make this system feel even more accurate to Witcher lore, icons representing Geralt’s sign powers show up every now and then, each one giving you a momentary boost. For instance, Igni and Aard can destroy upcoming enemy attacks, while Quen allows you to get hit once without losing a heart.

Lived like a baller, died like a hero.

Reigns: The Witcher is superbly well-written, and masterfully integrated into the world and lore of Andrzej Sapkowski and CD Projekt Red’s works. It doesn’t feel like a cheap cashgrab. On the contrary, you can clearly see that Devolver, CDPR and Nerial worked together in order to come up with an engaging random story simulator that feels right at home in this world full of liars, deceivers, and terrible outcomes for everyone. Granted, it’s not the most action-packed game in existence, but think of it as you role-playing as a bard, coming up with nonsensical ballads about imaginary heroes on-the-fly. It might actually be the closest to a true role-playing game The Witcher has ever felt in videogame form, even if the gameplay is still as complex as scrolling through Tinder when you have nothing else better to do.

Reigns: The Witcher is available now on PC and mobile.

Reviewed on Intel i7-12700H, 16GB RAM, RTX 3060 6GB and Asus ROG Ally.

A copy of Reigns: The Witcher was provided by the publisher.