I’m as big of a fan of a mashup as the next person, as evidenced by the fact that I made it through even one season of Glee. Being able to identify multiple components that work together to create something wonderful is awesome, and that definitely applies to gaming. However, the caveat is to take the good in while leaving the bad out, and indie dev Messhof has a ton of ambition in his new project, Blood Dungeon. Citing legendarily addictive titles like Spelunky and Vampire Survivors, Messhof, creator of the infamous Nidhogg, is looking to create a wacky, violent and bombastic gaming experience that keeps players locked in from beginning to end with endless potential. The result is certainly interesting and memorable, and, with the right amount of time and patience, could be a phenomenal gaming moment…provided that Blood Dungeon doesn’t put you off with its very essence.

If you’re still here after that line, then you’ll be fine.

I won’t insult anyone by trying to parse out a plot for what is happening in Blood Dungeon. You’ve got a hostel of some sorts where a series of strange and disjointed characters hang out, and you can choose one to dive into a certain part of this underground cavernous system. You attack enemies with your auto-firing weapon that can be anything from a gun to a laser to a giant, swinging sword. Enemies will usually drop blood, as is their want when they’ve been injured by whatever the hell you are. Collect enough blood to start the powerup roulette, where you can choose one of several advancements that might improve your current weapon, add a new weapon to your build or enable some form of passive enhancement, like faster speed or greater luck. Keep killing things until you die, and be assured, you’re gonna die, and probably angrily.

This is because enemies come in waves and, like other bullet heaven titles, they come from every direction. The first wave is usually fairly slow, though you’ll probably encounter at least one “elite” enemy that takes too many hits to go down, but will give you a quickie skill boost that’s usually worth the effort. Each wave ramps up the difficulty with new mobs that react and attack in different ways, shifting from “let’s gradually float after the hero” to “let’s explode when the hero looks at us funny.” After about five waves, you’ll run into the boss of the current biome who has a legitimate health bar, a name and an achievement if you’re able to take them down. Oh yeah, I hope you like achievements, because Blood Dungeon is chock full of them, giving recognition to what you kill, how you kill it and how you die. Exciting!

Not pictured: the satyr that killed me. Confusing, I know.

Straight up, if you vibe with the ridiculous bordering on ludicrous, then you’re going to have a good time with Blood Dungeon. Each stage is expansive enough to give you some opportunities to explore, but not enough to actually get you lost like Spelunky. Instead, you’ve got randomly generated keys, treasure chests and gates that change how you approach the run. Some pathways become blocked by timed doors, some by locked doors, and some that shoot the hell out of you until you can put them down. Key placement is exceedingly randomized, so don’t be surprised if one key will materialize within a screen of a door, and another key might lead to a door you don’t find before your untimely death. To be honest, the better strategy is just to move as much as possible and don’t bother with doors.

Every character that gets unlocked has their own pluses and minuses, with a variety of weapons and starting perks. From an orbital broadsword to some kind of spiderweb gun, these are just the starter traits: most, if not all, of these weapons can be unlocked throughout the level up process. There’s also an optional censor bar you can turn on for the two “nude” characters. Now, although I am a massive prude (as proven by my previous game reviews), I mostly turned on the censor bars because it was distracting. Skinja is an incredibly fast and versatile character, and positively lethal after the right techniques, but it’s a distinctly naked being with bits flopping everywhere, and I’m just trying to enjoy blasting the crap out of everything on the screen. There’s also a baby; it isn’t naked, just a baby with a gun. Do with that what you will.

That’s fire, don’t worry. Just a constant stream of fire. Leaking from my…feet.

There’s a lot that happens that’s really great about Blood Dungeon. Leveling up comes fast and furious, and there’s a good balance on perks upgrading and slowly ramping up the difficulty. Players will need to have exceptionally bad luck or purposely be running into monsters to die prior to level three. The pool of weapons and passives expands immediately, so planning on certain buildouts is next to impossible, making versatility and improvisation crucial to survival. Things like the burning boots and laser beams might be great on paper, but, when the RNG gives you the zombie ring three spins in a row, take the damn zombie ring.

The movement aspect also forces you to think and react in different ways. While it’s essentially a sidescroller, Blood Dungeon allows the character to cling to nearly every surface, allowing you to run along walls and ceilings without missing a beat. Jumping and good timing with your jumps becomes your most sought after skill, and it’ll be worth it to save up to purchase the jump upgrades from the passive bone shop. Oh yeah, along with blood and coins (used to unlock chests IN the stage), there are bones, which get traded to a delightful doggy wizard that permanently unlocks passive upgrades (movement speed, base damage, and jump skill). So, while your success in runs is incremental in unlocking more “stuff,” you can also target your updates to make life better overall.

Atmospherically, this game is an addictive banger. Each dive into a stage is fraught with mayhem and excitement, underlined by the breakbeat soundtrack and pulsing, driving elements. Everything is built to overstimulate you, and it’s further helped by the squiggly design concepts that Messhof brings with enemy and world elements. Ran through a CRT filter (which I highly recommend), it completely engulfs you in this sensation of a rogue arcade machine, like something that might exist in a movie or in urban legends. Even the name, Blood Dungeon, sounds like a game someone’s older brother totally saw once at a pizza parlor in Boise. You can easily get sucked into run after run, though there’s plenty of room to breathe so you can upgrade, change characters and decide which realm you want to go grind away within.

It grabs items! It damages enemies! And it actually works, unlike every real world boomerang!

At the same time, the chaotic nature can make for a few frustrating positions. The 2D/3D nature of movement means that some weapons, like the aforementioned orbital sword, work well, even if not as frequently as you’d like. However, the auto-targeting of the guns can be very unhelpful at times. In the beginning, you might end up targeting an enemy barely on the screen, while, later on, you’ll shoot something that’s technically closer, but slower moving than the next imminent threat. While it would betray the nature of the game, I wish that I could actively select enemies with certain weapons (particularly the handgun). 

In the same vein, the zombie debuff is incredibly helpful, but needs better indications. As zombies are shockingly resilient, enemies who are infected will attack other mobs and leave you alone, remaining on screen for a long time. But the only thing that distinguishes them from actual, damaging enemies is a tinge of color that is very easy to miss in the heat of battle. There’s nothing worse than hesitating about moving somewhere because it looks like a dangerous nest of enemies, only to realize that half are zombies, though not necessarily the half that you need it to be, if that makes sense.

This screen is dope, it’s just a shame I had to stare at it for almost ten seconds.

Lastly, on a technical level, I sincerely hate that Blood Dungeon completely froze up when I took a screenshot. The game itself ran so well on my computer and I had no problems when I was doing the game thing (playing, shooting, screaming). But when I wanted to grab a moment of gameplay to use in my review, I had to prepare for complete lockup, with a varying amount of time before gameplay would resume. If this was a turn-based RPG or something, no problem. However, when the goddamn Bone Snake is pixels away from you, having everyone take an indefinite teatime really throws you off your rhythm. I doubt this’ll happen for everyone (PC gaming, woo), but it still was a thorn in the side of someone trying to write a review.

With all that out of the way, Blood Dungeon is a fun, ridiculous cycle of enjoyable pain. The visuals and music keep your blood pumping even as it drains over the cobblestones. The weaponry is equal parts deadly and dope, and I never had a run where I was dissatisfied with the outcome. Messhof has crafted a loop that builds incrementally to a glorious crescendo of havoc, destruction and bones for everyone. There’s genuine excitement, abject stupidity and a serious sense of satisfaction when you finally get 10,000 bones for that jump enhancement. If you’re a fan of the bullet-heaven genre, we just got one more angel for the choir. This angel won’t stop waving its wang everywhere it goes, but that’s just how some angels roll. 

Blood Dungeon is available now on PC, PlayStation 5, Nintendo Switch/2, and Xbox Series X|S.

Reviewed on AMD Ryzen 5 3400GE with Radeon Vega Graphics and 16GB RAM.

A copy of Blood Dungeon was provided by the publisher.